SOMETHING TO WATCH
‘Fully conscious baby’ TikToks
The Internet’s latest obsession is a baby who really wants to go to the Four Seasons Hotel in Orlando, and you either get it or you don’t. Everyone is in awe? fear? of its mysterious cognitive abilities, and there are numerous deep dives, analyses, spinoffs, artistic interpretations, and edits for your viewing pleasure. Give in to the TikTok brain rot and let someone else have a fully developed frontal lobe this exam season.
SOMETHING TO READ
Critic Te Ārohi
Shameless self-promotion because we can: Critic is a great read – even outside of the crossword, horoscopes, and moaningful confessions. Nowhere else will you find content that relates so hard to your life that it’ll have you wondering whether Critic staff are in the walls of your flat. Because we are. We’re everywhere. We see everything. You can’t hide, little content puppets.
SOMETHING TO LISTEN TO
Country music
Country hate is cringe. Maturity is realising that country artists are fucking banger lyricists and that putting on a pair of cowboy boots and line dancing in your lounge is a way better vibe than finger fucking the air to DnB. And how could you watch Footloose without wanting to recreate the scene of Ren and Ariel tearing up the dance floor to ‘Fake ID’? Honestly, anything that's country is a good call. Giddy up, cowboys!
SOMETHING TO GO TO
The library
I know, I’m sorry honey. But exams are just around the corner and it’s time to lock the fuck in. Not everyone studies the best at the library – word on the street is that Central is the place for yapping, so maybe don’t go there if you’re easily distracted – but maybe stop kidding yourself when you say you’ll “just study from home”. No you won’t. Peer pressure makes diamonds, and you’ll slack off (and check the fridge) less if you’re somewhere public to study.
SOMETHING TO SUPPORT
Local businesses on George St
These businesses have been BATTLING during the George St renovations. Just walking past the construction site briefly had me reaching for my noise-cancelling headphones and hop-skipping Carrie Bradshaw style to get past as quickly as possible. Not only have workers at businesses on George been putting up with this noise (and weird concrete smells) but it’s been driving customers away, too. Show your support by swapping your Bargain Chemist haul shop for a browse in the local shops of George.
SOMETHING TO CANCEL
Wearing Uggs out in public
It’s kinda gross when you think about it. People pee on the footpath on a night out all the time and you're just stopping your little Sherpa covered feet around Dunedin, into gross footpath substances. They also build up a stench so just wear some fluffy socks and real shoes plz!