Archive

Degree factory churns out more WINZ applicants

Posted 7:08pm Sunday 13th May 2012 by Bella Macdonald

The University of Otago is divesting itself of nearly a tenth of its students this month, releasing 1,755 graduates into the empty void of unemployment. Graduation Ceremonies to mark the event are being held from May 6 to 19 in the Regent Theatre. 1,345 students are expected to attend the Read more...

Scarfies find their place in world is up trees, wasted

Posted 7:08pm Sunday 13th May 2012 by Claudia Herron

The iconic scarfie drinking game “possum” has gone global after an Otago Daily Times article reported concerns that growing popularity of the game is causing problems in the Dunedin Botanic Gardens. The story was subsequently run by The Guardian and The Sun in England, Fox News in the United Read more...

What Is A Whale Oil?

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Gus Gawn

As a change of pace from Callum’s usual dogged endorsement of rightwing doctrine, this week’s political pages will have an “everyman” flavour. No longer will you be subjected to the ranting of a man whose self-awareness and balance is as poor as your Alzheimer’s-riddled Aunty Dot that time she Read more...

NZ Cricket Sucks

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Callum Fredric

If you hear anyone talking about the Black Caps’s test team being in a “rebuilding phase”, this constitutes binding verbal consent to bowl beamers at them next time you hit the nets. When are the Black Caps not in a rebuilding phase? How many times have you heard the tired excuse, “well we may have Read more...

A Tale of Two Semi-Finals

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Callum Fredric

Good news, sports fans. Gus and I have swapped roles for the week. While this has dire ramifications for the quality of Issue 10’s political analysis, the sports pages will temporarily boast a vocabulary consisting of more than the words “bro” and “fuck”. So enjoy this preview of the 2011-12 UEFA Read more...

Drunk Wayfarers Get Their Just Desserts

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Josie Adams

Twelve students and their substantial quantaties of alcohol required rescue from Pudding Island on April 26, when they became trapped by the rising tide. After hearing the stranded students’ cries for help, Portobello residents alerted the Dunedin Coastguard. A rescue mission was sent out at Read more...

Not Enough Youth in Asia?

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Over 300 people filled the Colquhoun lecture theatre at Dunedin Hospital on April 26 to hear a panel discuss whether euthanasia and assisted suicide should be legalised. The panel discussion, entitled, “Euthanasia and Assisted Suicide: A discussion we need to have”, was prompted by Labour MP Maryan Read more...

Students unrealistic, possibly Oedipal

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Claudia Herron

New Zealand tertiary students expect to be receiving high salaries and view their mums as the coolest people in their lives, according to a recent Colmar Brunton poll. Colmar Brunton is New Zealand’s most notable market research company, and was established in 1981. The poll of 220 New Read more...

Power-hungry scarfies briefly thwarted

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Claudia Herron

The University was struck by a power cut at around 11am on Monday April 30, disrupting lectures and severing the campus’s internet connection. The cut was the result of a contractor outside of the campus interfering with a power cable with an excavator, which stopped the supply to the main Read more...

Sneaky students slyly subvert system

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Imogen Whyte

The University caught fewer cheaters than usual in 2011, with figures released by under the Official Information Act showing that cheating and plagiarism incidents have dropped at six of New Zealand’s eight universities over the past year. Of the 19,500 full-time students at the University Read more...

Sign of the coming apocalypse: Drinking age to twenty

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Staff Reporter

The National Government has expedited the third reading of the Alcohol Reform Bill, which will introduce a raft of changes to the way that alcohol is sold in New Zealand. One of the more noteworthy changes is a split age for the purchasing of alcohol, which would allow 18-year-olds onto Read more...

National: Putting the “n” in “cuts”

Posted 12:51am Monday 7th May 2012 by Charlotte Greenfield

Tertiary Education Minister Steven Joyce revealed major changes to the student loan and allowance schemes in a pre-budget announcement on May 3. The changes will come as part of the national Budget, to be released on May 24. From next year graduates will have to pay off their loans at 12%, Read more...

The Five Stupidest Taxes

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Callum Fredric

01 | Excise Tax (“Sin Tax”)Excise tax is a tax put on anything the government of the day considers sinful. Classic examples are alcohol and tobacco. Initially, the money is spent on funding healthcare for people who overindulge in these sinful delights, but governments inevitably succumb to their Read more...

When in Doubt, Slap a Tobacco Company

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Callum Fredric

All hail the brave warrior Tariana Turia, leading the small but valiant army of the New Zealand Government against the numberless forces of the evil tobacco companies. While outnumbered ten-to-one in terms of resources, the Government underdogs will prevail – because they have moral righteousness on Read more...

I Love Beer Pong Bro

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Gus Gawn

For the next five minutes (or however long it takes to read 800 words) beer pong counts as a sport. If you have a problem with this, direct emails to critic@critic.co.nz, which is thankfully not my email address. Beer pong is a sport in which teams of two compete against each other in a test Read more...

Women’s eight take on eight other women in Windermere

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Gus Gawn

The Otago University Rowing Club is sending a women’s eight crew to the prestigious Windermere Cup in Seattle, Washington. International crews are invited to take on the University of Washington “Huskies” crew at the regatta, which is one of the highlights of the intercollegiate rowing calendar. Read more...

Social Basketball

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by John Burton

This week we introduce a section in which guest writers give you a rundown of what’s happening in the social sports scene. Here’s John Burton with his take on social basketball. The Unipol Social Basketball League is a breeding ground for up-and-coming basketball players from the University Read more...

Five fifth-years frolic for fish in filthy waters of Leith.

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Bella Macdonald

A flat of resourceful fifth-years have proven that half a decade of being a scarfie is enough to survive in the wild, after an impromptu fishing expedition put smoked salmon fillets on the students’ dinner plates. At about 10.30pm on April 17, reported sightings of salmon in the shallows of Read more...

Winter of discontent paralyses destitute Auckland students

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Josie Adams

A study released this month suggests that 15% of students suffer from “absolute” financial distress and are unable to afford basic accommodation, food and clothing requirements. The Graduate Longitudinal Study, which produced the findings, sampled nearly 9,000 sutdents in their final year Read more...

Army Never Been to War, Are GCs nonetheless

Posted 4:56pm Sunday 29th April 2012 by Imogen Whyte

Christchurch’s Student Volunteer Army has been awarded the 2012 Returned Services’ Association Anzac of the Year Award, in recognition of its contribution to the Christchurch community following the Christchurch earthquakes. The award was presented on the eve of Anzac Day by the impressively-titled, Read more...