News

To the rugby desk, where a few weeks ago I touched on the subject of the media’s relation to sport and how it can be used as a positive or negative distraction from real issues. A timely example came immediately following a long and eventful election campaign when it can be difficult to fill a Monday news bulletin with anything actually newsworthy. Last week as Team Key celebrated smugly and with their smear campaign against the left complete, the media had to find a new bogeyman to demonise.

So what is the solution for a post-election slow-news day? Create a controversy around a rugby player’s night out on the town and saturate your news bulletin and websites with multiple ridiculous reports about it!

What is all the fuss about? Well, the All Blacks’ flight to Argentina was cancelled so the team had an unplanned extra night in Auckland and, with the permission of management, some of the lads went out for dinner, played some pool and had a few beers. Sounds fun. The party continued on and Aaron Cruden got separated from the rest of the group, who got back to the team hotel at a reported “reasonable hour.”

The ONE News team seemed perplexed as to where he went and why (not that it is really any of their business). Was it an alien abduction? Did he spontaneously combust? Was he converted by Mormons and sent away as a missionary? Chances are that he hooked up and went off to try his luck. Good on ya, mate.

The end result was that Cruden didn’t show up for the flight to Argentina the following morning and was subsequently cut from the team for last weekend’s test in Buenos Aires and this weekend’s decisive trip to South Africa. I get it, he let the team down but, no, it’s really not a big deal. Let’s all move on with our lives, shall we?

How many of us have gotten on the rinse during the week and then been a no-show at your POLS lecture the next day? Pretty much the same thing here.

All Blacks coach Steve Hansen gave his verdict on the subject with his typical monotone delivery that made it sound like he would rather be out drinking himself rather than fronting to the media. Reading between the lines of what he actually said suggested he really meant to say: “Yeah, Crudes had a few too many and stayed out late on the hunt then missed the plane, but we have plenty of quality Number 10s, so fuck off and do some real journalism, you hacks.”

What Hansen actually said was: "He understands there has to be a consequence for his actions. Once we get this out of the way, he'll be coming back into the group when we go to Brisbane," and that Cruden's actions “were out of character.”

What was also out of character was the rather polished and articulate statement that Cruden released to atone for his sins. His normal chat is usually full of “bro,” “cuz” and “sweet as.” That’s all pretty normal for a young guy from Palmy North. However, his rather lettered response said:

"I accept full responsibility for my actions and the penalty of missing the next two games, and I will work with New Zealand Rugby to undertake any other disciplinary action to work through this situation."

Whoever wrote this continues to embarrass Cruden further, saying:

“I carry the burden of shame and disappointment and I am deeply apologetic to my team, to my family, and also the New Zealand public.”

Wow, that is some soppy PR bullshit if I have ever heard it. Most Otago students “carry the burden of shame and disappointment” every weekend after a few bottles of Scrumpy, leading to some rather vague and hazy Technicolor memories of the Boogie Nites’ dance floor.

I get so sick of the media framing these guys as infallible and suggesting that they should have to play by different rules than the rest of us. All of this OTT media coverage was very quick to paint Cruden as some sort of folk-devil who took one sip from Satan’s poisoned chalice and ended up going on a Charlie Sheen-style bender that ripped a hole through New Zealand’s social and moral fabric. Maybe only the 86,000 Conservative voters were actually upset by this latest “scandal” but most of us know and accept the everyday binge drinking reality of our booze-soaked society.

Also, these sensationalised media reports contained more than a healthy dose of irony, as the faux outrage and anti-alcohol rhetoric sound bites were being played over B-roll footage of Cruden tearing it up on the field in front of the massive advertising hoardings belonging to sponsors like Heineken, Steinlager, Speight’s and Waikato Draught, to name a few, amongst various other wine and beer companies from Australia and South Africa. Sends a bit of a mixed message, don’t you think?

It seems fine for the team to take sponsorship money from these alcohol companies and display their logos everywhere, giving the impression that alcohol and sports is a marriage made in heaven. But the second some of that sponsor’s product passes the lips of one of the men who has been directly promoting it, the media leaps at the chance to tear them down for what millions of Kiwis do every week, which is getting drunk and staying up all night to get lucky.