Booze Review: Gordon’s Gin & Tonic

Booze Review: Gordon’s Gin & Tonic

Just as the University of Otago is a place of many firsts, Gordon’s Gin & Tonics 7% are the drink of many firsts: your first time going from zero to a hundred on the so-called “mum” spirit, getting blackout in your high school mate’s garage at the age of 16 and vomiting in between telling your friends you love them. A true milestone in every young person's life. 

Gordon will welcome you, humble you, and console you. He’s there for you at your lowest, like when you got too pissed on Tuis and now can't drink them without feeling ill, or when you decided to drink a whole $8 bottle of prosecco for a BYO. Faithful Gordon’s will always be there to turn to for a great night (once you’ve learned how to handle them). As perhaps the most accessible gin RTD on the market – unlike Bombay’s bank-breaking four-packs – Gordon’s Gin & Tonics are lovingly within arm’s reach for breathas and sheathas alike, with the beauty and courage to sit so-called “heavy-weights” on their ass. 

But the age old question remains: Gin & Tonic or Pink Gin & Soda? Having been known to knock back the spicy botanical water enough to consider myself somewhat of a connoisseur, I vouch for the classic. Their subtle lemon zing is perfectly refreshing for those summer afternoons as a thirst-quencher on the back porch (points if you’ve got a view of a cricket pitch). The lemon taste gives flashbacks to homemade lemonade that you made when you were a kid – which probably tasted like shit but it's the thought that counts. 

The classic Gordon’s also holds the title as the most universal RTD, able to smoothly transition from a quiet one into inviting over the boys and sinking the rest of the box for a big one. As the night goes on, the taste remains consistently good, without venturing into watered down Sprite territory. It’s also the easiest drink to chug. Got me feeling like I'm in my prime again (glory days), providing a great buzz throughout the night – the kind where you lock into Yap Mode and discover any stranger and their dog’s life story. “I’m so proud of you,” you’ll find yourself saying. A completely different drunk compared to the sloppy drunk of a Purple G where your mates start piling shit on you after you fold at 8:30pm. 

Gordon’s proves to be the most accessible, tasteful and best bang for your buck RTD out there. As the sun starts to peek out from behind the relentless grey of Dunedin winter, it’s one to reach for when you get that God-sent Dunner Stunner text: “Wanna crack open a cold one?” Is the Pope Catholic?

Pairs well with: Summer breeze, sand in your eyes, and a good cricket match

X factor: High percent = good time

Chugability: 8/10 light work, no reaction 

Taste Rating: 9.5/10, sentimental “ahh” drink 

This article first appeared in Issue 24, 2024.
Posted 5:14pm Saturday 28th September 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams.